My dear friend, Holley, wrote recently on her blog that she is worried about her parents, particularly her father’s upcoming surgery. And when I read her post, my heart grieved with her. I so well remember that dread, that fear, that “what happens to me without my parents?” And whether you admit it or not, no matter how old you are, you still feel that way until they are gone.

I wondered if our children worry about us. We have a son and daughter. Both are happily married and all four of our “kids” do take care of us. I smiled to myself when we came home from dancing last week and Kathy and Adam walked us into the house when they brought us home. It’s really really wonderful to feel loved!

But…what would I tell them if they were concerned about our deaths?

I would first quote my own father, who constantly reminded us that death is a natural part of life and that life is for the living. He also used to say “I just want to live until I die.” In those days, I thought that was a funny thing to say, but from this perspective, I understand just what he meant. I want to live as long as I can live — really live and enjoy my life!

Our mother had Alzheimer’s Disease from the age of 57. It was an 11 year nightmare watching this happy, loving wife and mother disappear before our eyes. Already I have been able to be with my children longer than mama was with us — in a real way anyway. I feel blessed with those extra years — like I got a bonus!

When I die, I hope my children will be glad I was around as long as I was — however long that turns out to be — and that they will enjoy happy memories of fun times together.

We are preparing for our family reunion (on my father’s side of the family). Part of this preparation is writing our memories of those original brothers and sisters we call Minnie’s Kids – my dad was one of those! I am compiling the memories as folks email them to me. This week we are focusing on the house on Shaw Street where our Aunts Ruby and Lillie lived. Over and over again, I have read — “they made me feel special.” and “I always felt loved in that house.”

You must realize that we are seniors (the age of your parents, Holley) writing our memories of a generation that is past — and yet, when we pause to reflect, we remember feeling loved and special as little children.

And so, Holley, that is the lesson of all of this circle of life talk. We live, we love, we die. And the piece of us that lives on and on in the hearts of those we love is that very love we have poured into them so gently, so carefully, for all of our lives.

I hope and pray that someday in the future my grandchildren will write happy memories of the love they found in our home. Is there anything that matters any more than that? I think not.

So, as my sister Betty would say, Enjoy the moments! Every moment of every day. Fill your time with your parents with happy loving conversations and laughter and enjoy them as long as you have them with you. And when the time comes that they are gone from this earth plane, replay those memories and bathe yourself in that precious love any time you want to! That is exactly what they would want you to do!

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When our children were very young, and Whitey still had vision, he required them to wake up and shout “Enthusiasm”. Our little five year old daughter would sleepily answer, “Fusiasm, Daddy, Fusiasm”.

Now we are grandparents, and this week, our grandson gave us the giggles as he told us he always shouts “Enthusiasm” when he wakes up. And of course he very loudly demonstrated exactly how he does it!

Yes, he had had some coaching from Poppy along the way, but we had no idea he was actually doing it. And I know his dad, our son, laughed and laughed the first time he did that! It is a joyful thing to see little traditions like that one passed on to the next generation.

The thing that fascinates me is that Whitey’s enthusiasm for life never faded with his vision. When I ask him about it, he refers back to good coaches and childhood athletic programs. All I know is that he has maintained that positive attitude and I am so thankful! Can you imagine living with a blind partner who complains all the time? Whew!

One of Whitey’s favorite writings is

Attitude

by Chuck Swindoll.

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.

Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company… a church… a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past… we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude… I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

And so it is with you… we are in charge of our attitudes.

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We met for lunch at a local restaurant. I was working for the March of Dimes at the time. Whitey arrived with our 12 year old daughter, Kathy.

After the normal catching up on the day, he looked at me and said, “Honey, I’m losing my sight.” I could not take it in.

“What do you mean? You need glasses?”

“No, not glasses. I really am losing my vision.”

That was 1988. Soon it was necessary for Whitey to stop driving the UPS truck. He has not really seen our children (or me) since that time. He has never really seen the grandchildren. Whitey sees shadows. People are like “trees walking”.

But life does go on. And we all adjusted pretty well. Especially Whitey. Ever the positive thinker and the guy with the newest jokes and pranks, Whitey keeps us all going. He likes to say he is much better off than many people and that he can do anything he wants to do except drive and read!

A former golf professional, Whitey still plays golf three days a week, and on weekdays, he walks up to the driving range with his golden retriever, Hogan. We both totally enjoy our children and grandchildren and all in all, enjoy an active lifestyle. He plays baseball in the front yard with the grands and he and our grandson love to hit balls on the range together. The children are very young, but they have quickly learned how to “help Poppy”. It’s neat to hear our 7 year old granddaughter tell him, “Poppy, there’s 4 steps” or “Poppy, it’s me.” Or to hear our 6 year old grandson report his successes or failures with the basketball net. “That one went in, Poppy!”

Why am I telling you all of this? Well, Whitey is a walking lesson in having a good attitude. When people say, “how are you?”, he responds “I’d have to be twins to be better!”

Over the next few days, I am going to tell you more about Whitey and our family. I also want to clarify that this blog is supported by my sales via Independent Living Aids. I am an affiliate for that wonderful company. We have been customers of ILA for many years, and so naturally, when I began to work on line, I became an affiliate. That means that if you need vision or hearing products, it helps me if you link to their site from my blog. It does not cost you any more, but it does help me. At the top of the page, you will see a tab marked “Resources for Seniors.” That tab will tell you more about Independent Living Aids.

And thank you! Thank you for reading this blog, for pondering this aging experience with me. Together we will learn and grow and continue to be active, involved senior citizens!

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I am quickly learning how desperately I need more patience — with clerks in the stores, with family and friends, with the television set, but most of all with myself! I think of the old prayer, “Lord send me patience and I want it right now!”

Very often I remind myself of this lady –

“WHERE is my SUNDAY paper?!” The irate customer calling the newspaper office, loudly demanded to know where her Sunday edition was.
“Madam”, said the newspaper employee, “today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered until tomorrow, on SUNDAY”.
There was quite a long pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a ray of recognition as she was heard to mutter, “Well, s***, so that’s why no one was at church.”

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Seniors often feel unheard, ignored. But you know what? It’s our own fault. If you feel unheard, what can you do to change your message so that it is heard?

I am a huge American Idol fan. Last week I laughed as 62 year old General Larry Platt sang his “Pants on the Ground” song. I totally enjoyed his performance, his energy, his happy attitude. And sure enough, the next day, when the video popped up on YouTube, over 34,000 people watched it. This in addition to the American Idol television audience — and from now on, when someone complains about kids wearing their pants hanging down, we will remember General Larry Platt’s song. I can well imagine parents across the country singing that tune to their teens! Can’t you? I know if we had had a teen who was dressing with his pants hanging down and hat turned sideways, and we had known that song, we would have been singing it and making fun!

Senior Citizen General Larry Platt made a difference and his message was heard loud and clear last week.

Sometimes it is not our message we need to change, but our delivery.

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Senior Independent Living is living life as independently as possible, with all the zest and vim and vigor we can give it.

Senior Independent Living is living with laughter and joy every day – with the clear joy of being alive. It means we are finally old enough to appreciate the minutes of the day, to determine carefully how to experience them, and living with a deep respect and love of our time here on this earth. Not in a depressed “oh no, I am at the last part of life” kind of attitude, but an attitude that says, “I am proud to be a senior citizen, and I want to do as many things, learn as much as I can, make as big a difference as I can, in the days and years remaining.” It’s an awareness of the preciousness of this life, of its limits, of our own limits, of our own mortality.

Senior Independent Living means searching for the products and resources that will help us to remain active. If that product is a vibrating watch or a lighted walking cane, to find those products, learn to use them and move on with dignity!

Senior Independent Living means knowing what our priorities are, living fully, loving deeply, and sharing what we learn along the way.

Thank you for being here with me on this interesting journey called aging! And if we are not discussing some part of this senior life that would be helpful to you, please leave me a note. We are exploring!

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Sarcasm! Seniors are more dignified than that, right?

Nope! We can all be a bit sarcastic from time to time. It is a rather disgusting habit. I am guilty of it myself.

So how do you let your readers know when you are being sarcastic? Big news! There is now new punctuation for sarcasm on line. I am a bit fascinated by all the stir, I admit. Is this how new punctuation is born? Do we really need punctuation to be rude and sarcastic?

You can download the SarcMark for $1.99 — and –no, this is not an affiliate link! I don’t want to encourage its use, but I do think the idea is interesting, and the video is right on target with it’s rudeness.

Ok, it’s funny to me! The question is, will we all be using the sarcmark in 2010? I seriously wonder about that. Is the sarcmark an idea whose time has come? Most of us communicate more in writing now than in the past. Watch the video. Ponder the sarcmark idea and let me know what you think. <a href=” >object>

Thank you Alex, for helping me get this video on my post!

PS This is post # 5 of the 30 day challenge!

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Yesterday I wrote about my favorite inspirational sites and later realized I omitted one of the very best!

I do sooooo enjoy opening my email in the morning to one of Carol Wingert’s beautiful photographs. Carol’s site is called I Photograph God and indeed she does! Carol is an excellent photographer and her photographs capture the details of our beautiful world. Pause just a moment to be awestruck. We are surrounded with such proof of Divine Order in creation. Just look at the details in this photograph of the peacock. We are not alone. Indeed! Amen!

The Beauty of One of God's Creatures

note: this is post # 4 of the 30 day challenge

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There is an entire buffet of information on the internet. You can find out how to do just about anything! In our house, we search often for trivia — hubby is a sports trivia person and he creates 4 quizzes a year for his old high school baseball team (they played ball in the 1950’s, folks!)

But I have a special little list of places I go for inspiration on the net — on those days when I need a boost, a positive thought, a little motivation. My list changes from time to time, but isn’t it wonderful to know that you can find instant inspiration right on your computer? These are my recommendations for inspiration today:

Daily Word I have been reading Daily Word for over 20 years now, and I was thrilled to find it on line, too. These are just short little devotionals from Unity — and quite often they are exactly what I need for the day!

LiteMind LiteMind is one of my most favorite blogs — and I deliberately set this link to my most favorite post — How to Tackle Any Issue with A List of 100! I imagine I have read that one post at least 50 times since the day it was published. It’s a technique that works for me over and over and over again!

Daily Prayers for Healing My dear friend Kate posts a prayer every day for us at Crabby’s Beach. Kate’s prayers are heartfelt and beautifully written. I keep telling her she is “in the flow” right now and sharing her innermost thoughts with the world. Her goal is to write a prayer a day for a year, and then another year, and then another. Thank you, Kate. Your gift is touching so many people!

Do you have a favorite spot on the net for inspiration? Will you share with us? Leave a comment and tell us about it. We all need inspiration daily. And thank you.

PS This is post # 2 of 30 in the 30 day challenge.

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Susan Boyle makes me smile. Of course I watched her special last week – I Dreamed a Dream: The Susan Boyle Story.

Listening to her sing always makes me feel joy from head to toe. Is it her talent? Her joyful sound that elates me, moves my soul? Of course that is a big part of it. But I tend to think it is more than her talent and her beautiful, humble spirit. I think Susan is also a symbol of hope to all baby boomers who are late bloomers just waiting to blossom. Do you agree?

Are you blooming or booming? I choose to bloom in 2010. Will you join me?

PS I got brave and bold and joined a group challenge of 30 posts in 30 days! This post is my post # 1!

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